May contain strong language and material that some people may find offensive
Date: Thursday 28th May 2020
Quarantine: Day
Location: Lincoln
Specifically: The Lawn CP under house arrest i.e because the police told me to stay here on Tuesday and not to move under any circumstances.
“Ah yes but the one on Wednesday told you to move and not to stay under any circumstances.
“My head hurts”
NEW DAY, NO FBI, ONE WAR PLANE!
What the hell!? Hymie can fly. No seriously, don’t be taking the piss. I’m woken up, not by the alarms (I’ve set two of them) but by the sound of aeroplane engines, the sort of sound the Red Baron (Snoopy the Red Baron that is) might make if he was to do a fly past on his way to the shops.
But where the hell is Hymie off too. I admit I’m scared but I have to raise the blinds and take a look.
OMG!
Lawnmower..
Whoops.
Oh well at least I’m up now and ready to start the day. So its chocks away, start the engines and fly over to the kettle for morning tea! Yay. Exciting.
RACHAEL
7.30 a.m prompt “Good morning David xx”
There’s no doubt these little prompts are working. Having someone to be accountable to continues to help me establish a daily routine.
This is how it looking so far
7.30 am Brrakfast
8.00 am Start work
10.00 Break
10.30 am Work
12.30 pm Lunch
1.30 pm Work
4.00 pm Exercise
5.00 pm Dinner
6.30 pm Work
8.30 pm Stop!!!!
Weekends: Work - but just on the stuff I feel like doing!!!
I just hope the diminutive dynamo (Rachael) can keep up the support for a few more weeks.
..... and from establishing a daily routine it is of course a natural progression to.....
PEEPERONI PIZZA
No thats not a misprint.
Look at this bloody thing.!
Any idea what it is? (or was might be a more appropriate question). OK OK I’ll give you that it bears a passing resemblance to a pizza (and I suppose the sub-heading is a bit of a giveaway. But I bet you would be hard pressed to guess what type!.
“PEPPERONI!”
Yes that was my first guess as well, given that I went into the shop and distinctly asked for the said comestible. Now call me an idiot...
“You’re an idiot!”
.... but I would have thought it safe to assume that a pepperoni pizza would look something like this ...
You see the difference? This proud specimen deserves to join the pizza hall of fame and have a star on Hollywood Boulevard. It has all the ingrediants and attention to detail that you would expect from a scrummy pizza - fine spices, delicious aroma, stuffed crust filled with hot melt in the mouth mozzarella cheese, baked to perfection, and, get this!! pepperoni!!! Lots of pepperoni. Why? Because its a bloody pepperoni pizza that’s why and (call me unreasonable) it’s meant to be smothered in pepperoni!
Now cast your mind back to the thing I showed you earlier..
“...can’t be arsed”
Never mind here it is again.
Do you see the difference?
You can see now why I was more than a little perplexed when I opened the box. First thought “argh fuck I ask for a pepperoni and they’ve given me a plain cheese. I was just on the verge of replacing the lid ready to go marching Mussolini stylee back to the pizza shop when I became vaguely aware of something small, crinkly and pinkish in colour “Oh come on settle down. What are your minds like !?) appearing to be making a bid for freedom from just below the translucent covering of cheese.
What these vaguely circular things were is hard to say but I would guess thin slivers of cherry tomatoes or, maybe scorch marks from the oven. There were four of these slivers in total liberally spread around the pizza in what appeared to be a limp and desperate attempt to make it look like the chef had been exceedingly generous with this particular ingredient.
Before I say a final goodbye to pizza allow me to show you one made by a company who actually succeeded in being tighter with their pepperoni than the takeaway where I purchased mine.
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